Popis zážitku
I went into convulsions, didn't realize I had just swallowed strychnine and was in state of panic. I was with someone who had died from electrocution and returned, he was at that time a Tibetan Buddhist who knew the Tibetan Book of the Dead and he began the ritual with me rather than taking me to the hospital.
As I lost control of my body, I felt something like an electrical heat moving along my spine, the visual field turned yellow. Then, I was suddenly in a place I can only describe as chaos: it seemed that everything that had ever happened, would ever happen, to all beings was happening at once and I was aware of all of it in detail. I wanted to find an anchor, a point of stillness.
I observed my parents making love and was drawn to them, experienced myself in my mother's womb, then my own birth and relived my life. Not so much the various experiences but what it was like to be myself at each stage of growing up, until I became an old woman and died again. At death, I again resisted with everything I could muster and was again terrified. The same experience repeated itself. This cycle happened several times until I finally surrendered at the death stage.
When that happened, I found myself in a blissful realm, of supreme love and wisdom. I remained there for an unknown period of time until I seemed to suddenly be back in my body.
I was completely disoriented. My friend, who had stayed with me, confirmed that I had died and all bodily processes had stopped. He sometimes talked with me about how both of us had crossed over and returned. The lesson I came away with was that fear and resistance take us to a lower realm of experience, whereas, surrender was an important state to be in to gain access to the realm of what could be called the ‘clear light’. I ‘knew’ that I would not permanently die until I was an old woman. The old woman I became is turning out to be very much like who I am now becoming, in appearance.
As I lost control of my body, I felt something like an electrical heat moving along my spine, the visual field turned yellow. Then, I was suddenly in a place I can only describe as chaos: it seemed that everything that had ever happened, would ever happen, to all beings was happening at once and I was aware of all of it in detail. I wanted to find an anchor, a point of stillness.
I observed my parents making love and was drawn to them, experienced myself in my mother's womb, then my own birth and relived my life. Not so much the various experiences but what it was like to be myself at each stage of growing up, until I became an old woman and died again. At death, I again resisted with everything I could muster and was again terrified. The same experience repeated itself. This cycle happened several times until I finally surrendered at the death stage.
When that happened, I found myself in a blissful realm, of supreme love and wisdom. I remained there for an unknown period of time until I seemed to suddenly be back in my body.
I was completely disoriented. My friend, who had stayed with me, confirmed that I had died and all bodily processes had stopped. He sometimes talked with me about how both of us had crossed over and returned. The lesson I came away with was that fear and resistance take us to a lower realm of experience, whereas, surrender was an important state to be in to gain access to the realm of what could be called the ‘clear light’. I ‘knew’ that I would not permanently die until I was an old woman. The old woman I became is turning out to be very much like who I am now becoming, in appearance.
Pozadí informací
Gender:
Female
Date NDE Occurred:
1969
Prvky NDE
Byla v době vašeho zážitku přidružená život ohrožující událost?
Uncertain Clinical death (cessation of breathing or heart function or brain function)
Not sure I understand the question; the ingestion of strychnine would be considered a life-threatening event, I think.
Jak považujete obsah svého zážitku?
Both pleasant AND distressing
Zážitky zahrnovaly
Out of body experience
Cítili jste se odděleni od svého těla?
Yes As I said, I saw all earthly events simultaneously as if they were all my own personal experiences and they were not time-bound. They were only a confirmation of what I was seeing myself as an old woman. The rest was much too involved, to separate any one specific event.
I clearly left my body and existed outside it
Jak se vaše nejvyšší úroveň vědomí a bdělosti během zkušenosti srovnává s vaším normálním každodenním vědomím a bdělostí?
More consciousness and alertness than normal Even when the experience was in, what I consider the ‘lower realms’, I was intimately aware of being inside the minds/bodies/emotions of all beings and experiencing all of their experiences. The experience at the end, in the clear light, was an enlightenment, whereby, I understood everything about reality, the universe, life, as if all of the answers were downloaded so I experienced completeness.
V jakém okamžiku během zkušenosti jste měl/a nejvyšší úroveň vědomí a bdělosti?
After several life-time reviews, when I gave up the struggle and surrendered.
Byly vaše myšlenky zrychlené?
Incredibly fast
Zda se čas zdál urychlovat nebo zpomalovat?
Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning
I've already stated, everything was happening at once, I was everywhere, inside the experience of a myriad of beings, experiencing their mental and emotional and physical states as if they were my own.
Byly vaše smysly živější než obvykle?
Incredibly more vivid
Prosím, porovnejte svůj zrak během zážitku s každodenním zrakem, který jste měli těsně před tímto zážitkem
I experienced multi-dimensional vision extending through space and time vs. limited perception of the 3D material world. I didn't see with my eyes but with my whole being: which was everywhere simultaneously.
Prosím, porovnejte svůj sluch během zážitku s každodenním sluchem, který jste měli těsně před tímto zážitkem
Oddly, sound wasn't a significant feature. I wouldn't say there was silence but, for example, words weren't spoken so much as instantly known directly via a kind of clairvoyance.
Měli jste pocit, že jste si vědomi událostí, které se odehrávaly jinde?
Yes, but the facts have not been checked out
Prošli jste tunelem?
No
Viděli jste ve svém zážitku nějaké bytosti?
No
Setkali jste se nebo si byli vědomi jakýchkoli zesnulých (nebo žijících) bytostí?
Yes I was aware of all beings, as if they were alive at the time of my experience. But I also sensed that this was a timeless realm so many of them may have been dead or not yet born, at the actual time of my experience.
Zážitky zahrnovaly
Unearthly light
Viděli jste nebo se cítili obklopeni jasným světlem?
A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin
Viděli jste nadpozemské světlo?
Yes It was sky-like but not exactly that. I think of it as what Buddhism calls the ‘clear light’. There was a clarity that went beyond what we think of as light, as if it was the ultimate refinement and source of creation: pure being-ness.
Zda se ukázalo, že jste vstoupili do nějakého jiného, nadpozemského světa?
A clearly mystical or unearthly realm I think I've already described this as much as is possible. I was in two completely different realms: when I resisted death, a realm of chaos (could be described as hell-like), and when I surrendered, a blissful, heavenly realm.
Zážitky zahrnovaly
Hellish imagery
Zážitky zahrnovaly
Strong emotional tone
Jaké další emoce jste cítili během zážitku?
I felt terror, fear of death until later on when I surrendered and immediately felt a supreme bliss and love.
Měli jste pocit míru nebo příjemnosti?
Incredible peace or pleasantness
Měli jste pocit radosti?
incredible joy
Měli jste pocit harmonie nebo jednoty s vesmírem?
I felt united or one with the world
Zážitky zahrnovaly
Special knowledge or purpose
Měli jste náhle dojem, že rozumíte všemu?
Everything about the universe In the final stage this is what happened, in the ‘clear light’ stage I had complete gnosis.
Zážitky zahrnovaly
Life review
Vrátily se vám scény z vaší minulosti?
No
Přišly k vám scény z budoucnosti?
Scenes from my personal future Seeing myself grow old.
Dostali jste se k hranici nebo k bodu bez návratu?
No
Bůh, duchovno a náboženství
Jaký význam jste přikládali svému náboženskému/duchovnímu životu před vaším zážitkem?
Greatly important to me
Jaké bylo vaše náboženství před vaším zážitkem?
Buddhist avid student of several spiritual teachings but strong inclination towards buddhism
Změnily se vaše náboženské praktiky od vašeho zážitku?
No
Jaký význam přikládáte svému náboženskému/duchovnímu životu po vašem zážitku?
Greatly important to me
Jaké je vaše náboženství nyní?
Buddhist
Zahrnoval váš zážitek prvky, které byly v souladu s vašimi pozemskými vírami?
Content that was both consistent and not consistent with the beliefs you had at the time of your experience At 19 I thought I had the ability to, using the will to live, throw off death, that I was a survivor. I was surprised at how afraid I was, thought I was more "together". The way the life review occurred had no relationship to any beliefs I had at the time. If I considered that at all I would have thought it to include scenes and events. I knew about the tunnel, but there was no tunnel. I had a philosophical concept of oneness but was not prepared for how literal it turned out to be, experiencing the entire lifetimes of a seeming infinity of beings simultaneously. I had no idea I would want desperately to escape that by being born into a single consciousness.
Došlo k změně vašich hodnot a přesvědčení v důsledku vašeho zážitku?
Uncertain Given that I was already devoted to a spiritual quest and philosophical inquiry at the time of this experience, I think it merely confirmed much of what I was already learning.
Zda jste se setkali s mystickou bytostí nebo přítomností, nebo slyšeli neidentifikovatelný hlas?
No
Viděli jste duše zesnulých nebo náboženské duchy?
No
Setkali jste se nebo si byli vědomi bytostí, které dříve žily na Zemi a jsou popisovány jménem v náboženstvích (například: Ježíš, Muhammad, Buddha, atd?)
Uncertain I was with all beings but do not recall anyone standing out as a special religious figure.
Během vašeho zážitku jste získali informace o existenci Boha?
Yes I saw how I originally chose my parents and entered my mother's womb. I also experience it all again, so it wasn't like a memory or being a witness to this, it was partcipatory...like repeating your part in a role again.
Během vašeho zážitku jste získali informace o univerzálním spojení nebo jednotě?
Yes Only the matrix of oneness could explain how I was everywhere, everyone, all at the same time. There was no single consciousness of ego, of "I", though I seemed to want to create that because I was overwhelmed by the flood of being all things.
Věřili jste v existenci Boha před vaším zážitkem?
God probably exists
Během vašeho zážitku jste získali informace o existenci Boha?
Yes Direct experience and immersion in this Presence with the gift of omniscience while I was there.
Věříte v existenci Boha po vašem zážitku?
God definitely exists
Pokud jde o naše pozemské životy kromě náboženství
Během vašeho zážitku jste získali zvláštní znalosti nebo informace o svém účelu?
Yes I can't express it; it's a knowing that the special knowledge arises second by second in our lives if we'll align to the Presence. I guess you could call it guidance.
Věřili jste, že naše pozemské životy jsou smysluplné a významné před vaším zážitkem?
Are probably meaningful and significant
Během vašeho zážitku jste získali informace o smyslu života?
Yes Yes, I had complete gnosis...sadly , I was unable to bring it back with me, it doesn't seem to fit into the human brain.
Věřili jste v posmrtný život před vaším zážitkem?
An afterlife probably exists
Věříte v posmrtný život po vašem zážitku?
An afterlife definitely exists Yes It was as if I was being allowed to practice dying, perhaps this was due to being taken through the bardos? Several times I died, experienced an after-life which included choosing parents from which to reincarnate, experience being in the womb, being born
Báli jste se smrti před vaším zážitkem?
I greatly feared death
Bojíte se smrti po vašem zážitku?
I moderately fear death
Byli jste vystrašeni životem před vaším zážitkem?
Not fearful in living my earthly life
Byli jste vystrašeni životem po vašem zážitku?
Not fearful in living my earthly life
Věřili jste, že naše pozemské životy jsou smysluplné a významné před vaším zážitkem?
Are probably meaningful and significant
Věřili jste, že naše pozemské životy jsou smysluplné a významné po vašem zážitku?
Are meaningful and significant
Získali jste informace o tom, jak žít naše životy?
No
Během vašeho zážitku jste získali informace o obtížích, výzvách a trápeních života?
Yes There seemed to be an underlying lesson that our suffering arises from our resistance to what we actually are and our will to define ourselves with boundaries and limitations. Inability to trust "the flow" and surrender to something greater living through
Byli jste soucitní před vaším zážitkem?
Slightly compassionate toward others
Během vašeho zážitku jste získali informace o lásce?
Yes the truth that "love is all" was revealed in an ineffable, transcending way..love isn't an emotion, but the awesome power of the life force itself.
Byli jste soucitní po vašem zážitku?
Greatly compassionate toward others
Jaké životní změny nastaly ve vašem životě po vašem zážitku?
Slight changes in my life Slight changes in my life. Not many changes other than a stronger intent to remember somehow to skip the fear and resistance when I next encounter death and step right into surrender. What fear I still have is that I'll slip back into the fear and miss the opportunity to go right into the ‘clear light’.
Změnily se vaše vztahy konkrétně v důsledku vašeho zážitku?
No No
Po NDE
Bylo obtížné vyjádřit zážitek slovy?
Yes
Jak přesně si pamatujete zážitek ve srovnání s jinými událostmi v životě, které se staly v době vašeho zážitku?
I remember the experience more accurately than other life events that occurred around the time of the experience The impact of this experience was greater by many magnitudes than any other experience in my lifetime...it stays with me.
Máte po své zkušenosti nějaké psychické, neobvyklé nebo jiné zvláštní dary, které jste před touto zkušeností neměli?
Uncertain I had certain gifts before this experience and can't say for certain that the experience added to that.
Jsou nějaké části vaší zkušenosti, které jsou pro vás obzvlášť významné nebo důležité? Prosím, vysvětlete.
Absolutely, the radical difference in what happens, depending on the state of mind we're in when we die. I was able to have two varieties of death experience. I also believe that the life review may be a ‘practice session’ to help us prepare ourselves for our transition and that it can be repeated several times if that might make a difference and allow us to ‘graduate’ to a better experience.
Sdíleli jste tuto zkušenost někdy s ostatními?
Yes I shared some of it with the friend who was with me, but only in a general sense. I've shared it occasionally with a few people but don't tend to talk about it because it's far outside of any words I could use to express. You had to be there. Lately, I have a friend who teaches courses on death and dying and have shared it with her. She is interested in knowing more about it. Usually people don't have much to say if I share this, not that they disbelieve me but with death, we're all usually left wondering.
Měli jste nějaké znalosti o zážitku blízkém smrti (NDE) před vaším zážitkem?
Yes I had been an avid student of reincarnation, death and dying, although there wasn't much actual reporting available at the time so I learned from spiritual texts, for the most part.
Co jste si mysleli o realitě vašeho zážitku krátce (dny až týdny) poté, co se to stalo?
Experience was definitely real When we experience something that is more real than anything else we've experienced, we tend to believe it real, which was true for me. It also helped that I was with someone (previously a physicist) who had died, been pronounced dead in a hospital, had a similar experience and returned. So he confirmed not only that I had physically died but that the after-life experience was something we both had in common.
Co si nyní myslíte o realitě vašeho zážitku?
Experience was definitely real I continue to study research in NDE, have had other experiences with it, though nothing so concrete. Many people report on the afterlife these days. Experiences can differ and I think it’s because of our mental conditioning, the mind is able to construct a world for us on the other side, or not, it may just set us loose in the m'lstrom of conditioned existence.
Někdy ve vašem životě se něco reprodukovalo jakoukoli část zážitku?
Yes I have, at times, re-experienced the ‘clear light’. I have at times, felt like I might be dying, so I was able to practice doing a better job. I never again entered the chaotic realms of ‘oneness’.
Je něco dalšího, co byste chtěli dodat o svém zážitku?
No.